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Stephen Colbert Gives Trump's 'Signature Brag' A Painfully Twisted Update

Stephen Colbert pointed out that Donald Trump’s conviction on 34 felony charges in New York means that he has lost his right to possess guns, with police already set to annul his license to carry.

“He’s gonna have to change one of his signature brags,” Colbert noted, then played a clip of Trump boasting he could shoot someone on Fifth Avenue and not lose any voters.

Colbert broke out his Trump impression to deliver the updated brag.

“Tell you what,” he said. “I can still stand out on Fifth Avenue and, I don’t know, give someone a purple nurple, a sack tap, atomic wedgie, wouldn’t lose a single vote. Not a single vote! Hit ’em with a rubber band. Wet willy.”

See more in his Thursday night monologue:

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