I Moved To France With My Son, And This Is One Culture Shock I Never Expected

On the edge of a bustling square in Bordeaux, France, there’s a small menu posted on the outside of an ancient limestone building, just beside its massive blue doors. The menu changes weekly, drawing passersby who review it with interest. For each day of the week (except Wednesday), there’s a different four-course meal on offer including a starter, main, cheese course and dessert. This isn’t the menu du jour of another trendy restaurant in a neighborhood that’s overflowing with them — it’s my son’s school lunch menu.

As an American who recently moved to Bordeaux with my family, culture shocks have become a familiar part of my daily life. Everything from grocery shopping and socializing to health care is dramatically different here in France, but somehow Oliver’s school lunch seems like one of the most significant differences between our old life and our new one.

Back in our hometown of Richmond, Virginia, Oliver attended a public elementary school where lunch was a quick, no-frills affair. The menu rotated through a brief selection of “kid-friendly” foods like hamburgers, chicken nuggets, hot dogs and pizza, with sides like French fries, fruit cups and baby carrots in plastic bags. The meals were served on disposable trays with plastic plates and cutlery, all of which were tossed in the trash at the end of each meal. Oliver described the lunchroom scene as loud and chaotic, with the lunch monitors struggling to maintain order. He would often come home famished and frustrated, complaining that lunch was his least favorite part of the school day.

And then we moved to France in late 2023 as a sort of grown-up gap year. We enrolled 7-year-old Oliver in a small private école élémentairein the city center that was