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Sometimes kids tell you what they need directly while other times you need to put some effort into understanding what’s going on. A young child, for example, may not have the language they need to articulate what they’re feeling, but a teen may be evasive because they’re anxious about confiding something personal.
My son, age 14, loves watching the Japanese show ‘Old Enough’ on Netflix. The premise is that young children — ages 4, 3 and even 2 — are sent to run errands by themselves. Cleverly disguised camera crews trail them on their journeys while their parents wait for them at home or some other predetermined meeting point. The kids walk though neighborhoods, cross the street, navigate public transit and manage interactions with shopkeepers. One little girl carries her mother’s work pants to be mended. Another child purchases dumplings from a vendor.
Chores: the one parenting topic on which all the experts actually agree. Kids should be doing them.
On Friday, Feb. 16, the Alabama Supreme Court ruled that several couples whose embryos had been destroyed when they were removed from a hospital freezer could sue for “wrongful death,” meaning the embryos are considered children in the eyes of the law.
Parents don’t set out to raise spoiled children, but we do care for them from the time that they are helpless infants, and this can launch us into habits that involve doing lots of things for them. But as children grow, we need to ensure that they are doing more for themselves, and not expecting you — or anyone else — to cater to every one of their needs.
Do you remember your child’s delight when they discovered the baby in the mirror, that uncomplicated joy in recognizing their own reflection? As kids grow, this delight turns into exploration: How high can I jump? How fast can I run? Curiosity can also lead to comparison with the bodies of others. How do I stack up? Am I taller, bigger or stronger than my peers? I remember my daughter beaming with pride when she informed me that she had earned the title of “most flexible-ist” in the first grade.
Ask any American with young children what their No. 1 household expense is, and you’ll hear the same answer almost every time: child care. Each family finds its own way to manage. Some parents are pushed out of the workforce. Others work jobs they wouldn’t take otherwise, or hold down multiple jobs in order to meet their families’ needs.
We all know to watch our language when we’re around kids: no swearing, no adults-only topics, no gossip you wouldn’t want them repeating to anyone else. If we slip on any of these, we generally realize it right away and can follow up with an “I shouldn’t have said that.”