My Immigrant Family Stole A Goose Egg From A Park And Ate It. Here's What I Want You To Consider.

The reactions to the now-viral story of Haitian immigrants from Springfield, Ohio, being accused of consuming animals that weren’t rightfully theirs — from cats and dogs to ducks from a public pond — have been as varied and divided as this country itself.

In my politically divided household — my husband is a Republican, I’m a Democrat — what we believe largely falls along party lines: Hubby is convinced that at least some version of the story is based in reality, whereas I’m more convinced that this nationwide obsession about what’s allegedly happening with immigrants and Americans’ beloved animals in a Midwestern town reflects a xenophobia as old as time.

Still, there is one reaction to this story that I have not heard and that I am embarrassed to confess, but think I should: I can relate to the fake news version of this tale. I’m not from Springfield and have never been there, so my intel on what is happening on the ground there is only as good as whatever Apple News feeds me.

The consensus among these sources is that there is no wrongful consumption of animals of the sort that Donald Trump, JD Vance and other Republicans are claiming. But as a first-generation immigrant and one of those academicky, social scientist types who likes to think really hard for fun, I’d argue that even if there was — hypothetically — a case of someone uninformed or desperate enough to eat, say, a duck from a pond, wouldn’t that say more about their circumstances than anything about their character?

Once upon a time, I was new to this country, and in a small town in the middle of this great land, I remember stealing an egg from a nest in a public park. I didn’t do this as a prank, as maybe some other child may have done. I did it for the